Select Quotes from “18 Million Voices” Protest March: TRANSLATED

All I have to say about the Democratic Convention is, "whaaaaaaat?" I missed the latest episode of "Bum Fights" for this? It's hell getting that smuggled into Arkham. Especially since of lot of guys here are in it, but I digress. I also despise the Clintons more now than ever! Where’s that shootout at OK Corral I was promised by the media? They did everything but sing Kumbaya then have an orgy at this lethargic love-fest of a convention. Where’s the anger, the angst, the hostility? What happened to slipping in the blood on the convention floor and heads being put on sticks? In short, Bill and Hill ruined my entertainment. But at least there’s the Republican Convention to look forward to. They’d better do it up right, or I’m canceling my cable…AH, HA, HA, HA, HAAAA!

Fortunately for me, my good friend and fellow inmate…I mean fellow PATIENT…and former CIA translator Marshall Dunn came across some angry dialog from the streets by former Clinton supporters here:


http://weblogs.newsday.com/news/local/longisland/politics/blog/2008/08/dnc_quotes_from_prohillary_cli_1.html

That’s what I’m talking about! Feel the burn. Can we all not get along since it makes for better television anyway? All the ingredients of anarchy: rebellion and inflammatory dialog from poor players strutting and fretting their hour upon the stage. Tales told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. Now that’s entertainment! AH, HA, HAAA, HAAAA!


Toni Alves,, San Francisco
Toni: "Obama wasn’t elected, he was selected. If you look at all the caucus fraud, you’ll see his delegate lead was only in the red states. …she won the popular vote and she should be the nominee.”
TRANSLATION: “It’s pretty obvious that I've been woefully uninformed about the long running debate regarding the caucus system versus popular vote until Clinton lost the nomination.”

Toni: “I’ve been a Democrat for 40 years this year, and if Obama is the nominee I’ll vote for McCain.”
TRANSLATION: “Give in to my demands or I’ll overtly set myself up for disappointment one last time. Then you’ll be sorry.”

Toni: "These people are trying to scare us about Roe v. Wade. Well, you know what? I am beyond my reproductive years. I don’t care. it’s time for these young Obama women who think it’s so cool to support him, they can worry about their own reproductive rights.”
TRANSLATION: “Consider me the antithesis of the women’s suffrage and biological rights movements, You know…a REPUBLICAN!

Diane Schrack, Colorado
Diane: 'Because it was OK on the upper level, the national level, it was OK on the local level, too. The DNC is deeply guilty. It’s so frustrating. It makes me want to become an unaffiliated voter. I am a Democrat. My goal is to make Democrats think about what we’re losing here. If we’re going to give up women in this race who’s next? Who are they going to give up next time?”
TRANSLATION: “They threw us under the bus like Clinton did the gays in 1996 and we don’t like it one bit.”

Diane: "Antisemitism? Let’s have a little bit of that. Or next time let’s have a little bit of racism, or maybe have a little bit of gay bashing next time.”
TRANSLATION: “Let’s turn back the clock to 1955 so I don’t have to restrain myself so much.”

Diane: "They sacrificed women because they could take their vote for granted, and that is not what Democrats stand for !"
TRANSLATION: “The Democrats should maintain their long standing tradition of losing to Republican candidates to appease the most vocal faction of the party, just like the GOP caved into the evangelicals to win.”

Poison Ivy to be Keynote Speaker at DNC

Dr. Pamela Liilian Isley, aka “Poison Ivy” has been named one of the key note speakers at this month’s Democratic National Convention. The former eco-terrorist, current Arkham resident was selected to speak on the 88th anniversary of women’s suffrage in the United States over dozens of more prominent women by a pro-Clinton Group, Colorado Women Count/Women Vote. It has also been announced that Hillary Clinton’s name will be placed into nomination at the convention, clarifying what “suspending” ones’ candidacy actually means.

Obama visited “Ivy” at Arkham last week and after a short meeting, Obama emerged smiling enigmatically and apparently intoxicated, Addressing the press, Obama proclaimed, "I am convinced that honoring Sen. Clinton's historic campaign in this way will help us celebrate this defining moment in our history and bring the party together in a strong, united fashion," It was like watching a sucker punch in slow motion.

To put the latest, perplexing events into some sort of skewed perspective, fellow Arkham resident, The Joker, offered his insane insight. “Ivy is a very clever girl, yes she is. Before Obama can even get to the podium, he’s going to be ensnared in so many vines of voter discontent, he’ll be lucky to get free by Labor Day. Ah, Ha, HAA, HAAAA!” The Joker noted that Dr. Isley was formerly a noted botanist that “grew some really good weed” before she was popped, but escaped a prison term by coping an insanity plea. “She played Obama like an oboe. Actually more like a bassoon with it's, deeper, richer tone. She’s smart enough to realize she needed to toke him up to take him down. What a rube! AH, HA, HAAA, HAA!”.

Another Arkham resident, Huggy Bear was shanked shortly before his interview but said from his hospital bed, “Word on the street is that Hillary and her loose cannon, Bill, are going to highjack the nomination and have hired an excess of evil to leave Obama for politically dead.” Reportedly a secret, villainous organization called PUMA (Purging Up More Anger) plans to “finish the job Jesse Jackson started” and attack during the convention.

In a press release, they stated: “There will be no unity in the Democratic party until the voices of the 18 million voters who support Hillary Clinton are heard and heeded. Until the voices of Pumas are once again listened to by the leadership of the Democratic party, we will be guided by that defiance. We will not be bullied, brainwashed, or bossed into falling in line.”

Al Gore is supposedly crushed by the outpouring of support for a person who lost the nomination. “There was no organized anarchy on my behalf when I won the freakjng election! I am depressed…” Meanwhile, McCain and his presumed running mate General Zod are content to sit back and let the Injustice League hand Obama his head. On vacation in the Phantom Zone, Zod said, “Personally, I’d like to make Obama kneel before Zod, yada, yada, yada. But, why should I do all the heavy lifting?”